How Letting Our Kid Dive Into His Passion Helped Him Bloom

Inspired by a 60 Minutes Episode

Many years ago, in 2012, I was watching an episode of 60 minutes about a mom whose son had been diagnosed with moderate to severe autism and was therefore put in many therapies.  Seeing him make little to no progress, she opted to pull him from his therapies and instead focus on his strengths and interests in hopes to draw him out of the world in his head.  Her goal was to mainstream him by kindergarten, which she was able to do.

Through allowing him to pursue his interests it became apparent that this kid had an intricate brain and many of the behaviors they were trying to fix in his therapies were symptoms of his brain working in such complex ways

**CAVEAT: Now I realize it’s not generally wise to drop all of your kid’s therapies (though in his case it was) and also that his story is a small percentage of autistic kids (I mean hello, he is a savant with an IQ higher than Einstein’s) but I do think it holds true that when you focus on what someone is good at, rather than only trying to strengthen what is weak, they will blossom! 

This 60 Minutes episode would have a deep influence on me, though right then it was just an inspirational story.  (I recently had the chance to read the book about this incredibly moving story called THE SPARK by Kristine Barnett, which I recommend for ANY parent!) 

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Our Story

At the time of watching this episode, I had two beautiful kids ages 1 & 3. Our 1-year-old son was not yet talking but we were waiting for a language explosion just as we had seen in our then 3-year-old.  Delayed talking runs in the family.  I personally didn’t talk until after age 2, and my daughter learned to both walk and talk at 18 months.  We told ourselves, he’s a boy, a 2nd born, it will come soon enough…

Well, when our son neared closer to his 2nd birthday we decided to move forward with an evaluation done by the Birth to 3 program.  We soon found out he was 50% delayed in speech along with a slew of other delays.   Speech therapy, Occupational Therapy, and Developmental Therapy were all recommended.

Early Childhood Program

We proceeded with a year of all the therapies, which thankfully were mostly done in our home.  And at age 3 he qualified for and started school at the Early Childhood program in our district.  Since therapy is automatically included in the program, we thought it would be the best option, instead of doing private therapy and working through insurance.

He still was not talking at this point, so we really had no idea what he thought about school, though he seemed happy to go.  He went for one year.  I was less than thrilled with the Early Childhood experience because 1) I had PLANNED on homeschooling and this felt like the loss of a dream to me and 2) It didn’t seem to help him with the areas he really needed help in (mainly expressive speech.)  He did have a wonderful OT while at school, but he only worked with her for 15 minutes 2x/week, and that was within a group.  It wasn’t anything like the 1:1 attention he had before for 1 hour each week.

However, I was pregnant with my youngest at the time and it was my first year of homeschooling my oldest, so I welcomed the break I received by having him in school each day for a few hours.  I was very tired due to pregnancy and now what I know was undiagnosed thyroid issues.  I look back and see that year of Early Childhood as God’s provision during that time.

Brain Balance and Beyond

Shortly after his 4th birthday, we pulled him out of school and put him in a program called Brain Balance.  Brain Balance is pretty intense and to do that AND school just seemed like too much.

When Brain Balance was over we made the somewhat scary decision to keep him home and put him in private speech and occupational therapy. I say scary because this meant the responsibility of his education rest completely on my shoulders.

While it was certainly “easy” to send him to school, and I felt less of a load because I could say “Hey, he’s in school, getting the services he needs”, the reality is it (school) hadn’t done much to help him and I knew in my gut we could accomplish more at home.  I also had that 60 Minutes episode in the back of my mind which influenced my decision.  And while I was unsure of that decision at the time,  I’m so glad I took the leap of faith to home educate him.

**Another caveat here: Early Childhood can be hugely beneficial for some kids, but it just wasn’t for mine. Every kid is different!  

Passion for Weather

It was around this time, at almost 5 years old, that it became obvious that this little dude was a little bit crazily preoccupied with the weather.   He would talk about it all the time which his therapists referred to as “perseverating”.  This immediately took me back 10 years to my very first year as a classroom teacher when I had differently wired 2E (Twice Exceptional) kid who was OBSESSED with roller coasters.  This was another way God was preparing me for my own kids. 😊

It bothered me that my kid perseverated about the weather.  I thought it necessary to help him NOT be fixated on the weather. So for a short-lived time, I would always re-direct him when he got going about the weather.  However, again, because of that 60 Minutes episode, I had this nagging prompting that this was a passion of his and it was ok and good, and even necessary to let him DIVE DEEPER into this.

So soon we would start buying weather books (that we would read to him) and instead of trying to redirect him to another topic, we allowed him to dive deep into his interest of weather.

And now?  This kid’s almost 9 and this obsession with weather is NOT. GOING. ANYWHERE.  He’s graduated from kid weather books to adult weather books and is an avid reader of fiction, non-fiction… you name it!

I attribute a lot of that to not spending so much time focusing on his weaknesses and rather, letting him lean into his strengths and watching him “grow” from there.

 

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Vision Therapy: 12 Week Update

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Dyspraxia or Vision Issues?

We took the plunge and began Vision Therapy for Joe, our 8-year-old, in the fall.  It had been recommended by both a neuropsychologist who did an extensive evaluation on him and it was also recommended by his occupational therapist.   He has had difficulty catching and kicking a ball for his whole life (and other activities that require coordination).  These difficulties certainly go hand in hand with his dyspraxia.  But we have often wondered, how much of his dyspraxia is related to his vision?

We held off for a while due to the likelihood of insurance not covering it (that proved to be TRUE, though the evaluations are covered).  We spent big bucks on Brain Balance when Joe was four, and it’s honestly just hard to continue to pay for things that are not covered by insurance.   Though when they truly help, it IS worth it!

Exam Results

Following his very first evaluation done by The Vision Therapy Center, it was determined he has Convergence Insufficiency, a very common diagnosis.   They gave us a script to get glasses with a prism and made from a special material.  These glasses almost immediately helped with his ability to catch a ball – pretty amazing to witness!

After that initial first exam and one other exam they did, they gave us the results.  Joe had deficiencies in his visual processing related to FOCUSING, TEAMING, and TRACKING.   He also has some retained primitive reflexes, which they work to integrate as part of his therapy plan.

We do about 20 minutes of exercises at home 5  days a week and go the center for therapy once a week.  He will finish in summer after 36 weeks of therapy.

Improvements We’ve Seen

We are happy with the results so far.  These are some of the positive things we’ve seen, along with the improved ball catching:

Reading faster  (Joe was already reading well, he is just able to read faster now!)

Fewer headaches

Interest in puzzles (in the past he was not interested in doing them)

Slightly better short-term memory – we notice this in his ability to complete tasks.

Improved handwriting.  There was lots of room for improvement here, as academically, this is Joe’s weakest area.  However, the improvement is noticeable which is quite exciting for us, and more importantly, for Joe!  See the captions for the dates of when these handwriting samples were taken.  The biggest improvement is his ability to write smaller, which is seen especially on the last sample from today (though you may not be able to tell from the picture!)

Vision Therapy
9-26-18
Vision Therapy
11-26-18
Vision Therapy
1-4-19

 

Handwriting Aids

We have also started using this slant board per the advice of the optometrists at the center, to reduce fatigue when handwriting.

And while we’re talking about handwriting, these pencil grips are amazing.  Joe just got them for Christmas and tried them out and whoa!  So comfortable and easy to use. I have a poor pencil grip myself and these felt very natural to use.

ETA: Here is a post with results after 36 weeks of vision therapy were completed.

If you’re curious or want to know more about vision therapy, in general, I highly recommend the group on Facebook “Vision Therapy Parents Unite”.  Or if you just want to learn more about Vision Therapy you can check out this website.

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Brain Balance: A Parent’s Perspective

Unbiased Review of Brain Balance

What I hope to accomplish here is give an unbiased review of Brain Balance.  I know all too well the energy spent trying to do what is best for your child. I have spent hundreds if not thousands of hours researching things to help my children, especially my middle child, who completed the Brain Balance program in 2015. Back in 2014 when we were considering the program and saw the price tag, we did our due diligence to look into the program. It was not cheap (around $10,000) and not covered by insurance.

This post contains affiliate links through the Amazon Associates program and any purchases made through such links will help defer the costs of maintaining this website (at no extra cost to you).  This is absolutely separate from the Brain Balance franchise.

Homeschool Made Simple

Is Brain Balance a Scam?

It was frustrating to find that most people labeled Brain Balance a “scam”. Those comments did not come from other parents whose children completed the program. I wanted to hear from parents… Did they see an improvement in their child with the program? Did they think it was worth the hefty price tag? Was Brain Balance the “golden ticket” to helping their child?

Hard to find Unbiased Reviews

The few reviews I discovered from other parents revealed that most saw improvement, though some not as much as they would have liked. What I have done in this post is given an objective review of Brain Balance by laying out the benefits and drawbacks to the Brain Balance program in an unbiased fashion, as well as offer some other tips.  If you are a parent or care-taker looking into the Brain Balance program for your child, I hope you find this helpful.

Some Background

My son (now 8), was diagnosed with developmental, speech and gross motor delays around the age of 2.  We did see signs of delays before that, but my daughter (now age 10) was also a late walker and talker (she had an explosion of both at 18 months) and we thought that might be the norm for our children. My son didn’t crawl until 11 months, walked at 16 months, and didn’t really talk until age 3-3 ½. He had and has motor planning difficulties.  Now we have an official diagnosis from a neuropsychologist of Dyspraxia, which is a brain-based condition that affects one’s ability to coordinate and plan motor tasks. (we got this diagnosis a year ago when he was 7).

We heard about Brain Balance shortly after his 4th birthday.

Much of what we heard was new to us. We had never heard of primitive reflexes. Learning how retained primitive reflexes can be the source of blockades to normal everyday functioning and cause your brain to stay in a “baby brain” type state was fascinating to us. We had heard about Brain Balance through a homeschool convention and the evaluation was actually free for anyone who had attended the convention. Due to that, we decided we had nothing to lose by doing the initial evaluation.

Homeschooling with Dyslexia

Following the evaluation, we learned that our son had retained 5 of the 8 primitive reflexes that Brain Balances tests for. This blew us away but also gave us hope. There was a reason things were harder for him. After doing our research, we decided to bite the bullet and immerse ourselves in the program. We emptied our HSA and college savings for the kids and made it happen. Our thought was there would not even be college in our son’s future if we didn’t remove these hurdles first.

The Nuts and Bolts of the Brain Balance Program

Our son was recommended to complete 6 months of the program(or 72 sessions). He went every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday and completed one hour sessions with his “coach”. We were recommended to adhere to a Gluten-Free, Dairy-Free, Soy-Free, processed sugar-free diet. We did do this and were strict about it for those 6 months.

Some supplements were recommended. The main one I remember is probiotic.

As part of the program we did his exercises at home on the days he did not have a session with his coach.

Do I recommend the program to parents considering it?

That depends on your situation.

If you have an older child who you’ve already tried a lot of interventions with, this may be a good option for you.

If money is not a problem, I would say sure, do it. You will able to accomplish a lot in a short order of time. It isn’t a magical pill though. Know that the exercises at home do take time. And the diet changes take work and preparation, not to mention an increased grocery bill and possible resistance from your child. Also, if you have a younger child, motivation could be an issue. This was one of our biggest hurdles. Getting our son to do the exercises with us at home was hard work.

If you’re thinking “How can we possibly afford this without getting a 2nd mortgage on the house!?”…

Homeschool Made Simple

I have some suggestions of other things to try first:

1) Primitive Reflex Integration:

Find an OT (Occupational Therapist) who can help with primitive reflex integration. You will have to ask around and do your research to find an OT who will work with your child to integrate primitive reflexes. We had 3 OT’s before we have the one my son has now. His current OT takes a more integrative approach and it’s covered by insurance. If I had found her before Brain Balance, we probably would not have done it. It’s important to remember that OT’s are not all the same! Do your research!

2) Diet:  

Try some diet changes at home first. Diet can be huge for some kids, especially kids with sensory issues and digestive disturbances. I will warn you this can be overwhelming to navigate. This is our favorite gluten and dairy free cookbook!

3) Vision Therapy:

Look into Vision Therapy, which is sometimes covered by insurance. A huge part of Brain Balance, at least for us, was the vision exercises. As far as I know, Vision Therapy does the same type of exercises and more extensively (and under the care of an optometrist). *We are actually currently in the process of looking into Vision Therapy, as it has been recommended by our son’s OT and Neuropsychologist.  **Edited to add: Go here to read about our results from vision therapy.

4) Bio-Medical Interventions:

Research bio-medical interventions. Often kiddos with developmental delays or other issues have trouble detoxing and are holding on to toxins, especially heavy metals. Looking back, I wish we had done a detox protocol BEFORE beginning Brain Balance. I think we probably would have seen a more lasting change had we done that first.

For detox, I suggest looking into and researching Advanced TRS. Please know that is also my personal sales link. If you want to learn more check out this FB Group: TRS – A Safe Heavy Metal Detox.  There are other detox protocols out there as well. I’m just not familiar with them. 

5) Brain Balance Home Program:

Read the book Disconnected Kids  by Robert Melillo (Brain Balance’s founder) and try to implement a home program.

One big attraction of Brain Balance is that it encompasses most of the above. It does make it less overwhelming to have a “one-stop shop”.

Edited to add: Another resource worth checking out is Dianne Craft’s Brain Integration Program.  You can find Dianne’s website here. Other Considerations

Brain Balance is a franchise. It is not a medical institution. They classify themselves as a learning center. The “coach” your child will be working with for each session is not a doctor or a certified therapist. They are an employee of Brain Balance. I will say, our “coach” did a great job with our son. We also met with the director (who was very knowledgeable and competent) at the beginning of our child’s six months, once in the middle, and then at the end.

If we could go back in time, would we do it again?

This question is hard to answer and to be honest, I go back and forth about this. Not that it matters because what’s done is done. However, I realize that my answer to this question may be significant to someone researching the program. Usually, I answer “yes” to this question. We did see major improvements in a six-month time frame. Most noteworthy, our son was able to integrate 4 of his 5 retained reflexes (I must point out here though, he gained his Moro reflex back). His listening comprehension when from a 3.5-year-old to a 6.5-year-old, which was HUGE.

We did feel that through the Brain Balance program we were able to get to know our child better, which is significant. However, If I could go back to the very beginning, when we first discovered all of our son’s delays at age 2 or 3, then I would have found an OT who did reflex integration and done some heavy metal detoxing.

Final Thoughts

Finally, I do not think Brain Balance is a scam, but I also do not think it is the only answer. I truly hope this unbiased review of Brain Balance is helpful to parents considering the program. If you have any questions feel free to contact me, through the contact form on my page.

Blessings to you on your journey with your child! And if you’re feeling overwhelmed, please remember this is a marathon, not a sprint.

Disclaimer: The purpose of this blog post is to give an unbiased review of Brain Balance from someone who has had a child go through it.  I am not a medical professional. Any advice I give here is my own and based on personal experience.

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