Recently I was driving my 8-year-old son to his vision therapy appointment.
Being that the therapy center is 35 minutes from our house, I usually make use of that car time by playing an audiobook.
It was just him and me in the car that day, and so I asked him, “What book do you want to listen to?”. He responded with, “Can we just talk?”
I SIGHED QUIETLY to myself.
“Sure, honey”. I knew well what “talking” meant – bring on the questions! The rest of the car ride was a Q&A session. Normally me giving the answer, “Hmmm… I don’t know…”, OR “We’ll have to get some books to look that up.” I am now on the hunt for good books about the Titanic, because that is where this conversation Q&A marathon went….
I’m convinced my son’s brain is directly connected to his mouth…
And I’m thankful for how verbal he is. See, he did not start to really talk until around the age of 3 1/2, and we were pretty concerned, so truly I am thankful that he talks… even if it overwhelms me at times.
Since I’m introverted and am recharged by time alone and in QUIET, his endless questions can feel like an ASSAULT to my (already suffering) “mom brain”. And don’t get me wrong, I love this kid to PIECES! He is one of a kind! But it doesn’t change the fact that the non-stop chatter feels like OVERLOAD.
Every time I hear “Hey Mom?”, my neck gets tense and I take a deep breath. Usually once “Hey Mom?” starts, it continues to a string of questioning for the next “X” amount of minutes.
His questions are a combination of genuine curiosity about the world around him (he’s my nature-smart kid) AND the fact that his brain is not totally organized (related to visual processing and auditory processing issues which we’re working on in occupational and vision therapy). He processes almost EVERYTHING verbally.
When asked to “be patient” and hold his questions until I am done talking to someone else, he has a difficult time. He is afraid he will forget his thought… and the fact of the matter is – he will! So naturally, I give this kiddo some grace, even though I’m sure onlookers don’t always understand.
Tips For Other Moms of Chatterboxes
I don’t have it all figured out but here are some strategies that help me with my incessant talker:
- When busy or just not in a position to be on the receiving end of a barrage of questions, give your kiddo an ear for a few minutes. But let them know you will need to move on (to whatever you need to do) in a certain amount of time.
- If the “Hey Mom?” is in regards to them wanting to SHOW you something they’ve made or they need you to DO something for them, and you’re currently in the middle of something, it’s ok to have them wait.
- If it’s information they seek, do whatever you can to get them reading! Once he learned to read (at age 7), our son’s non-stop talking did ease up. It got much better because he was no longer relying on me only for information intake(whether that was through conversation OR me reading to him).
- To help them learn how to work on their communication skills, try the communication game, which I described in this post under ‘Bravewriter’. This game challenges them to use their words EFFECTIVELY. They have to be selective and choosy about the words they use in order to do well in this game.
And now signing off as I enjoy some quiet moments by the fire… AKA “Brain re-charge” time. 🙂
